Decolonise yourself
“The truth is, no one of us can be free until everybody is free” ~ Maya Angelou
Decolonise Yourself
None of us are free until all of us are free and your work starts with YOU. Practice freeing yourself and the world (RRP: €99)
Even cis, white, able bodied, neurotypical, heterosexual men suffer in these last dying gasps of patriarchy, white supremacy, extreme capitalism and other systems that have oppressed so many for so long. Your trauma might be related to one or more of these systems and if you have AuDHD (autism and ADHD), your “justice sensitivity” may make it feel impossible to stay informed and sane. But you can
Read on for more on how we might work together to help you decolonise yourself either one to one (online or by telephone across Ireland and the UK or with face to face indoor or outdoor nature-based sessions in Westport, Co Mayo, Ireland) or through group events Scroll down for immediate access to simple and effective self-care, Self care and collective ideas, Self and self-care rituals, resources and mind-body practises you can start implementing right now for instant results. Are you ready to start healing yourself and helping to create a fairer, more peaceful, sustainable, just and free world for EVERYONE?
Coming soon
While I wish so many people weren’t suffering as so many different types of hate have been legitimised for too many, am looking forward to helping as many people as possible support your nervous systems and hearts so you can decolonise yourself, your practice and take better care of yourself and all our communities during these final (we can do better! Defy dystopia!) days of white supremacy, patriarchy and late stage capitalism. Extra sensitive nervous systems, with AuDHD and trauma, need extra care to not go into dorsal vagal hopelessness (or Freeze! in Polyvagal Purrs language) Join me for Sustainable Practice When the World is on Fire at 10am (until noon) on Saturday 22nd August, 2026.
It’s all very well saying smash the patriarchy / white supremacy etc etc
But it’s more important than ever to remember we’re all connected.
To challenge and dismantle oppression speaking up for ourselves and supporting others in doing the same.
To support ourselves and each other without burnout in response to global horror shows
To heal the intergenerational and ongoing trauma and co-regulate by connecting with and being proper allies to people in other marginalised groups. And to do the healing on our own marginalised parts whether wounded by white supremacy, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism or something else.
I’d love to offer a safe space for everyone but while I’m the daughter and granddaughter of immigrants and now an immigrant myself AND living in a country I have a blood link to for the first time in my life, I look white and sound English.
You might want to find someone from groups that represent specific parts of your identity
This is an evolving list and if you know of something you think I should be including, please email me their link to eve@selfcarecoaching.net
Pavee Point: Traveller and Roma Centre
A little bit about my background
Our family was quadrupally colonised: 1) Goa, where my mother’s family was from, was colonised by the Portuguese then 2) India by the British so my ancestors lost their ability to speak Konkani and wear saris generations ago. 3) Kenya (where my mother was born and raised) was another British colony. And 4) Ireland, where my dad’s from (and where I emigrated to after the Brexit vote, having always had an Irish passport) also survived the British.
I had a pretty good life growing up mostly in the UK but because of my background, never felt British myself. As far back as I can remember, I felt guilty about the pretty good life being at such high cost to such an enormous swathe of the globe. The history I learned at school, pre internet, bore no resemblance to what I heard at home and I didn’t know how to untangle and challenge things properly so would just get tearful. Until the Brexit vote, I think I naively thought that better brains than mine were trying to figure out how to face the past and sort reparations!
For the past few decades (after I finished my English Lit degree and felt cheated at having spent three years at university after years and years at school studying almost exclusively white men), I’ve been decolonising myself but only began to learn this language a few years ago.
The embodied approach that is at the heart of all my work is KEY
Certain world leaders and more local politicians and hate groups may want to divide us and scapegoat some of the most vulnerable people on the planet (including trans people, refugees).
By taking responsibility for the energy we put out into the world and supporting ourselves with rest, spaces that are safe from overt hate and microaggressions, we can remember that while colonisation stripped so much of the world of its connection to the earth’s wondrous abundance (there’s STILL enough for everyone on the planet if only distribution weren’t so messed up) and collaborative, inclusive ways of living.
Your body holds the key to your and the world’s healing. It’s natural to struggle with embodied and somatic practises when holding so much personal and intergenerational trauma.
When you feel upset or angry, LET YOURSELF. It might not be possible to connect with it fully in that moment but make time to get curious about it later that day. USE that anger. Don’t turn it inward by self medicating with drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, overwork or whatever else helps you numb the pain of such systems.
When you feel joy and enthusiasm, follow those feelings too! Tired? Rest!!!! Hungry? Eat! Stuck? Find a kind of movement that brings the same kind of pleasure and joy to you as a happy, healthy cat stretching or leaping or playing.
Reconnecting with your body and the earth not only feels amazing but is a radical act of reclaiming your body. Reclaiming your connection to all the bodies that came before yours (your ancestors). And reclaiming your connection with this glorious, nourishing planet that’s ALL of our life support system.
You might want to start by saying, “Hi there, Body – so sorry I’ve been ignoring you for so long. What do you need right now?” As with Inner Child Work, your body may feel shy and even distrustful at first but persevere and find a sense of peace, ease and JOY at being in your own skin that may have never felt even remotely possible.
Working with the Divine Feminine
Just as our bodies have been commodified and we have to remind ourselves that we need only to listen and pay attention in any given moment, colonisers spread the message that we couldn’t trust our own connections with Spirit but had to go through an intermediary.
You KNOW, when you look at the ocean or mountain or forest or any favourite natural landscape – or a baby / loved one / animal etc – there is divinity in all of us.
I’ve been working with the Celtic Wheel of the Year for decades (join us) and was really fortunate to be able to train as a Moon Mná Women’s Celtic Circle facilitator with Dr Karen Ward soon after I moved to Ireland. You can listen to our interview here and she guested on the Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham Podcast too and for Sacred Ireland with Dr Karen Ward: Episode 114.
Moon Mná (moon women) offers way to connect with the Irish Goddesses and sacred sites and it felt like a beautiful way to connect with ancient ancestors on my Irish side and get to know my new home country. As we worked through the Rites throughout the year, even though I’d been a trauma therapist for so long, an ENORMOUS amount came up for healing in beautiful, gentle transformative ways.
While, over the decades, I’ve read and listened to a lot of yogic philosophy and have integrated it into my life doing my best to follow the Yamas and Niyamas, my Indian side was colonised centuries ago, learning Portuguese and then English. They were more orthodox Catholic than my Irish Catholic side! I’ve read and loved books about the Indian Goddesses but they, while very respectful, weren’t by INDIAN writers.
When benefitting from practises that aren’t yours, make sure it’s done in a respectful way that honours the heritage and is cultural appreciation rather than cultural appropriation. Eg, a yoga class that honours the yoga philosophy as well as the breathwork and physical practise v exploitative classes.
Would you like to feel more connected with the wisdom of your body and of the earth?
While I probably didn’t even know the world decolonisation back in 2016 when I was writing the book, my whole life and own trauma recovery and work around embodiment (finding peace and ease again in your own skin) has all been an effort to decolonise myself so I feel confident that you’ll find some ideas that appeal for YOUR self.
Some free resources about decolonisation
Read about some of my highlights from IACP’s 2024 conference here
Planet Mindful, Autumn 2019
Rebecca Seal on the systems that make us feel that we’re to blame for our struggles
Caroline Shola Arewu, author of Opening to Spirit, on “beditation”
Sarupa Shah on doing NOTHING (a practise I still struggle with but so recognise the value of) and SMILING at yourself – how radical is THAT?!!!! Just because you deserve the same care and love as others
Martine Henry on dance and drumming and giving yourself GRACE
Emma Turnbull on yoga, Ayurveda (traditional Indian medicine) and life as a practise
Veena Urgargol on yogic philosophy
Dr Karen Ward on Sacred Ireland
Louise Lucas (formerly Louise Brown) on neurodivergent and queer self care
Jayne Leonard on cooking AS self care – nourishing ourselves daily