Including 4 new letters that may become as familiar to you as ADHD as Drs Hallowell and Ratey’s potentially less stigmatising VAST model (Variable Attention Stimulus Trait) becomes better known…
Watch or listen here (or wherever you get your podcasts)
Which of these 25 terms resonate most for you?
Which ADHD (or VAST) terms had you hoped to see included?
Comment or reply to let me know for a future episode.
le grá (with love),
Evei
FULL TRANSCRIPT
I remember part of the training involved the recognition, both through our own practice and through working with others, that often if, for example, someone is working with anxiety and they start practicing mindfulness, it’s not uncommon for them to report feeling more anxious. In reality, they’ve normally been experiencing those physiological symptoms and the mindfulness practice makes it more conscious and helps us get better at making choices that alleviate the anxiety. Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham and welcome to The Feel Better Every Day Podcast.
I am so excited to be sharing new trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly ideas for you to help you take better care of your Self, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself, as well as the basic self-care, which we all know can be so challenging at times. I really appreciate you tuning in. If you want a deeper dive, you’ll be getting bonus content each week if you sign up to The Sole to Soul Circle.
You can do that for free or from as little as eight euros a month and you can also find more ideas in the book. 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing. Welcome to episode 53 of The Feel Better Every Day Podcast.
Today we’re deconstructing some of the jargon around ADHD. It’s not quite an A-Z, but there’s a lot there and I’m smiling because I remember I used to feel completely overwhelmed by all the jargon and over the past few years some of it still makes me laugh because it’s not very intuitive and other bits are completely of course. When I learned to practice and teach mindfulness well over a decade ago, I remember part of the training involved the recognition both through our own practice and through working with others, that often if for example someone is working with anxiety and they start practicing mindfulness, it’s not uncommon for them to report feeling more anxious.
In reality they’ve normally been experiencing those physiological symptoms and the mindfulness practice makes it more conscious and helps us get better at making choices that alleviate the anxiety and that help us regulate and help us make changes to our lives. Similarly with the ADHD jargon, I’m never a fan of jargon, but I have felt like it’s been learning a new language the past few years and some of it is so helpful when I realise it’s not just me. I do occasional newsletters called “Is This Me or ADHD?” because I think like so many people with the diagnosis, whether it’s self-diagnosis or official, it can be like well tick tick tick tick tick, I feel really like, “Yep this is all me”, but I thought they were personality traits.
So understanding that they’re traits and symptoms and then also recognising that ADHD presents differently in different people obviously, so getting a sense of which ones feel most resonant for you and finding ways to support yourself through it. I just sneezed, I hope I don’t need to edit that out, I tried to pause it in time.
We’re going to start with ADHD burnout and it’s different to regular burnout but it can be a real problem. I know that I’m constantly amending my schedule in order to minimise it because even now more than 20 years into being my own boss, being in the really fortunate position to be able to control my own schedule, I will still do too much, I’ll hyperfocus, that’s coming later and then I’ll be fit for nothing for days.
It’s really useful as with everything to notice for yourself when you feel it, what helps you when you’re in it, what helps you recover more quickly, what helps you prevent it, the more awareness you have the easier it will get for you to actually prevent this endless cycle by building in more rest, taking more off your plate. Progress not perfection as with everything but it’s a practice and just even recognising that you’re potentially more prone to it can help you recognise that you are worthy of the extra supports and accommodations in your own life and if you’re your own boss or if you’re working for someone else, really advocating for yourself and knowing you’re worth it.
The second term is convocoaster which is not a clinical term but it’s for when we go off on a bit of a conversational rollercoaster. The people who know and love us might be patient and wait knowing that we will come back eventually.
I remember my housemates when I was at Bangor University in the ‘90s talking about me being a bit like a runaway train and that if they kind of hung on I would get back to the point eventually. I had no idea about ADHD back then but being patient with yourself, being patient with loved ones, recognising okay there is a point and you will get back to it and also supporting yourself if you’re in a meeting or if you’re in a situation where you want to be as focused as possible and making brief notes for yourself.
Number three, we’ve got Glimmers, a term coined by the delightful Deb Dana who has helped make Polyvagal Theory accessible to more people. We’re all so familiar with triggers and how something that others might not notice can have a pretty debilitating effect on the nervous system. Glimmers are their opposite.
It might be the way the light looks on a puddle, it might be the way it can be all kinds of tiny things, larger things but getting to know your glimmers and creating an environment for yourself, creating a schedule for yourself where you are likely to experience as many glimmers as possible is going to contribute to your ventral vagal wellness and overall wellbeing.
It’s a wonderful way to help alleviate some of the suffering and to really enjoy the way things look or feel or taste or smell or sound, just let yourself feel glimmery and set playlists for yourself, really enjoy it, really indulge yourself as much as possible.
Number four is moving on to hyperfocus and for Half Moon members (that’s the free subscribers, you can subscribe at selfcarecoaching.net/sole-to-soul-circle/ or selfcarecoaching.net) you’ll be getting an email newsletter with a video around hyperfocus and how you can support balance and harmony in your life by working with your own hyperfocus a bit better. Hyperfocus is one of the many reasons why ADHD as a name is not loved by so many. I’ll get on to that later but we don’t have a problem focusing when we’re interested in something. When something grabs us, we often have difficulty unfocusing. So often, people ignore bodily sensations like hunger or thirst or needing the loo or sleep or whatever it might be. Becoming aware of your areas of hyperfocus, becoming aware of your energy levels, of your interests, of the things that need to be done and finding ways as much as possible to make it work for you.
Like I said I’ll go into this in more detail for tomorrow’s bonus content, the deeper dive, but you can just think for yourself, when did you last hyperfocus? Was it a joyful hyperfocus? Was it a stressful hyperfocus?
It can actually be really enjoyable building time in to go down random rabbit holes, something you may never have heard of and all of a sudden it’s the most fascinating thing in the world and we live in an information age and it’s very easy to research and find out more and it’s I think really helpful to recognise the joy in that and put supports in place and also to recognise the things that you perhaps need to be doing. I’ve recently completed a massive revamp of my website and it’s taken a year and a half because I initially hyperfocused and then I got distracted by lots of other things and I wanted to complete it but there was a lot of behind the scenes stuff.
It’s an enormous site and I was creating a library and my virtual assistant helped a lot but it just took a really long time and then in the last few weeks recognising I was near the end, I let myself go into hyperfocus.
I scheduled days in where I could work. I didn’t have sessions those days and working around the clock but in a planned way. I’m not advocating working on the clock, it’s something I’m still working on myself but in this instance it was such a joy to get it done and then I built in some time off afterwards.
Know that you’re going to get hooked into things, knowing that certain things are going to produce more dopamine and you’re just going to get really enthusiastic about them rather than beating yourself up for the way your brain works. Work with it as much as possible.
Moving on to impulsivity (number five), it makes me laugh that I didn’t realise that I was impulsive until I got my diagnosis (combined). Once I realised it, I realised of course I am. I can remember going back decades, certain things I did. A couple years ago I leaped onto a conveyor belt at an airport because I thought that my luggage was being taken away without it being labelled.
It was the middle of the night in Norway, it had been a stressful few days, my uncle was dying and there were no humans around. I saw my suitcase disappearing and I just leaped onto the conveyor belt like a thing possessed. I’m surprised I didn’t fall and hurt myself.
Suddenly there were loads of humans around and they were telling me off because I shouldn’t have done that but it’s that kind of impulsivity. I guess not everyone does that and I can think of so many examples through my life where I’ve been like. “Well obviously you had to do whatever” and other people are like, “No, you really didn’t.” So like I said with the mindfulness earlier, knowing that I have this tendency towards impulsivity, my life has changed.
I’m still waiting to hear from the doctor if I’m able to take the ADHD medication. I’ve had the cardiology report, things are looking promising but just knowing I’m impulsive helps me attend to that impulsive part of myself. My spending has improved, my eating has improved, my time management has improved, all sorts of things have improved just by recognising that impulsive part of me needs to be attended to and loved and cherished and enjoyed when appropriate. But it cannot drive my life. It just cannot be in the driving seat. So recognising it’s a thing is definitely helping that awareness, that consciousness and I hope it does for you too.
Moving then to inattentive (number 6), again I didn’t really know that not everyone did this but I did know that I often gave the impression of listening really well and not taking anything in. And because I now understand more about my brain, I’m better able to own it and be honest. I think because my dad was a teacher when I was growing up, I kind of grew up pretending to pay attention and at school and all the rest of it but in my head I was all sorts of other places.
I was recently in B&Q and I asked where the loo was. The kind person said it is do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do and I was like, “Magic. Thank you so much!” and then I immediately said, “Would you mind repeating that please? I said magic as if I understood it and I was nodding as if I understood it but I have no idea what you just said!”
And because I’m 49 now and because I feel safe now, I can own it. She laughed and she was so sweet and she showed me where it was and I found it. It was brilliant but I thought I can’t tell you how much of my life I pretended to nod along and understand things that were just whoosh.
I think also being Indian Irish, I recently had an experience… not recently actually, it was over 10 years ago. I was in Italy at a psychosynthesis conference and some people think I look Italian or Spanish and I realised that when I was doing my normal nodding along. They were talking Italian at this conference in Florence and people were then talking to me and they thought I could understand and it was like, “Oh my god! I really can’t!”
I’m not sharing a How To Do Things here, I’m just sharing how more awareness is helping me in hopes that it will help you.
Giving yourself anchors that help you when you’re inattentive so you don’t go down a rumination (number 8) pathway but you instead have nice happy places you can visit in your mind. Ways in which you can use that time to do something that works for you. I feel like I’m being naughty suggesting that! But it’s so helpful.
Moving on to justice sensitivity (number 9). Again, I didn’t understand how other people seemed to function when certain things were going on in the world. I’d burst into tears reading the newspaper before I learned how to practice Metta and send loving kindness to all involved. I remember all sorts of situations which I’m actually not going to name now because I don’t want to upset anyone. There’s so much going on in the world now. There has been for such a long time but I didn’t understand how other people functioned when I just felt just broken by something going on so far away. Understanding that justice sensitivity again is a symptom, is a trait, helps me recognise, “OK. It’s just my differently wired brain.” What can I do, not to fix the problem (because even though my name’s Eve I’m not responsible for the whole world this is something I keep reminding myself of) but what is within my power what is within my capabilities and my time available and my energy levels and my desire to help.
We so often think we have to do all the things whereas just doing something in that direction can help alleviate some of that intense pain that accompanies daily life a lot of the time. There is so much injustice in the world and it’s not about turning a blind eye it’s about honouring your strengths and capabilities and energy and harnessing it so that you can potentially make much more of a difference without hurting yourself. Without burning out. Without feeling utter despair.
Moving then to misophonia (number 10) and I didn’t realise there’s so much I had no idea about. That actual pain that accompanies certain sounds. Again, I thought everyone had it and I didn’t understand how they’d be able to focus on whatever other people were saying rather than, “OH MY GOD!” But also thinking about adults in my life when I was a child.
Certain things they’d pick up on and certain things that they would criticise me for, well meaning potentially but painful to experience. Recognising they probably had misophonia and it was painful to hear whatever.
With all of this, I think there’s a grieving not just for ourselves with late diagnosis ADHD but also if we then recognise symptoms in the adults in our lives and think not only how different our childhoods might have been and younger adulthoods if we had known about ourselves but how different, how much less intergenerational trauma there might be had they known. And had they had the support that they needed and deserved and that could have made them better in their roles as adults in our lives.
So we then move to neuroaffirming (number 11), which I hope you’re familiar with. You want to, if you’re working with anyone one-to-one, make sure they’re neuroaffirmative rather than pathologising you, recognising a strengths-based approach and really working with your delightfully differently wired brain.
And doing the same for yourself, not dismissing yourself, not beating yourself up about things you can’t change, but working with the gifts and the strengths that come with it as well.
PDA (number twelve) makes me laugh. The pathological demand avoidance. I used to hear the whole time as a child, as a teenager, that I was, I mean, I was, I can’t remember exactly what I heard because I was kind of inattentive tuning it out, but I remember a lot of being told off about not doing what adults wanted me to do. And as an adult now, as a 49 year old, I still have to be careful with myself.
If I want myself to do something that I know is good for me, I have to really be gentle and I have to kind of approach it like an adult might in terms of giving a small child vegetables and kind of sneak them in because the pathological demand avoidance is high. And it just makes me laugh now and I can own it and I no longer let it sabotage me. It’s like, “OK, I need to attend to that part of me that really doesn’t want to be told what to do even by myself!”
Working with yourself again and reminding yourself you’re not forcing yourself to do anything, but something might help, see how it goes, play with it, have fun.
Then we move on to the painful rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD) (number thirteen), which is incredibly painful. I also want to flag that everyone experiences rejection as painful, but with the rejection sensitivity dysphoria, it can feel especially like, “How to recover?” but it’s not an excuse to make your feelings more important than anyone else’s. Obviously they need to be to you, but it’s not fair to expect other people to put their needs and wants below because it’s about recognising and having empathy for yourself and also for others, for ourselves and for others.
We might feel things more acutely, but again, when you say that, when I say that, I don’t know how someone else actually experiences it. They might be feeling it much more deeply than I realised from their reaction, because they might be used to getting on regardless while dying on the inside. But rejection sensitivity dysphoria is incredibly painful. One of the things that helped me was becoming a writer, where I basically had to deal with so much rejection.
It didn’t desensitise me to it, but it did teach me very early on that the best thing to do was to take action. I’m in a position right now where I’m waiting to hear back from a few different situations and teenage me would have languished and stressed and ruminated and all the rest of it. But when I became a professional writer, I just learned to get on with it.
It doesn’t mean that I don’t feel it. I still go through far too much of my life thinking that people don’t like me or hate me or I’ve done something wrong or I mean, it’s much, much better than it was, but it is a painful way to be. And it’s very recently that I realised that not everyone goes through life like that!
Be gentle with yourself and use the pain you feel to be gentle with others as well and to be sensitive about the way you reject others.
Moving on to revenge bedtime procrastination (number fourteen), I know we covered this in the sleep issue and also in the second episode with Rebecca Seal (and later I think with the Chris Oxborrow and Louise Lucas episodes). Notice when you’re staying up late and you don’t want to be, notice again that potential PDA. That, “Don’t tell me when to go to bed!”
Ask yourself what benefits you’re getting. Often it is that kind of quiet time, that peaceful time. See if you can make changes in your schedule so you can get those needs met, but in a way that doesn’t leave you feeling exhausted so much of the time. Log your sleep.
Don’t be harsh with yourself, but notice like in an ideal world, if you were in complete control of your schedule, what time would you be going to bed at? What time would you be waking up at? What time would you be starting work out or getting on with whatever you’re getting on with in the day or potentially night?
Think about your ideal schedule like that and know that while beneficial sleep occurs, like extremely beneficial sleep occurs before midnight, that’s just not possible for some people. You can work with your chronological clock, you can work with your circadian rhythms, you can work with your schedule and you can befriend your environment and you can make all sorts of tweaks that make you want to get to bed.
Again, check out, I think it was, I can’t remember the number of the episode, it was 49 for World Sleep Day, but check it out for some of the tips and making your bedroom as inviting a place as possible, as indulgent a place as possible, but thinking about the kind of things that are keeping you up, that you’re getting sucked into, that work with yourself rather than, “I should be asleep, I should be going to bed, I should be more organised.”
Find ways of gently accommodating yourself throughout the day. One thing that’s really helped me, it’s been something I’ve been working with for a long time, is building in a longer lunch break so I can do some household chores or garden stuff in the day. So it’s not like I’m working late and then having to do all the things and then getting to bed really late or feeling behind the whole time or getting hyperfocused and not getting to bed at all or having time blindness, not realising how much time has passed.
It’s again mindfulness and getting to know yourself and getting to know yourself with compassion and curiosity and love and that will increase and you can overcome everything and recognising that you’re not wrong for whatever your preferences are and you can make tweaks or bigger changes that will support you in your day-to-day life if you choose to.
So moving on to stimming (number fifteen). I was telling someone today I have a chair opposite where I sit at my desk. It’s really a dining room table under a tablecloth and I’m able to, without looking too conspicuous, I just made it look more conspicuous there for effect, but just kind of gentle forward folds, feeling the stretch in the back of the legs and helping me feel more present, more grounded in sessions and when I’m working like writing or whatever it is. Or getting up, moving, all sorts of movements, thinking about that really when you have to be still and giving myself permission to move in whatever way feels friendly, getting up, maybe doing an extra bit of yoga as well as the morning yoga, maybe going for a walk.
Earlier I popped out, I only had ten minutes between sessions and I just did five minutes of moving branches around the field to add to the dead hedge and it was just like perfect. So thinking about the kind of movement, the kind of activity that helps soothe you, that helps with the right kind of stimulation, so if you don’t have much space you could simply tense and release the thighs, inhale as you tense, exhale as you release, you’re coming into the body in a safe, mindful, grounding way, but recognising with trauma as well as with ADHD, wanting to move, feeling that, giving yourself permission, not, it’s really funny as I’m talking about this, I’m extra conscious of how much I do move around but it’s also something I’m really aware of how deep conditioning goes.
I will regularly be saying to clients, especially if like they’re recovering from surgery or an illness or an injury or something like that, they’ve expressed that they’re not comfortable and it’s like what can you do right now to make yourself more comfortable and because so many of us have grown up not being allowed to do that, even when you’re being explicitly asked how can you take better care of yourself right now, it’s like, “Nope, I’m fine, I’m going to sit still, I’m going to torture myself.”
You don’t have to! Recognise the times where it’s perfectly fine for you to honour your body’s need to move, to have those stimming behaviours and to soothe yourself.
Moving on to spiky profile (number sixteen), I absolutely adored this when I heard about it (check out the Louise Lucas episode for more).
It made sense again of so much of my life, like when you’re really good at certain things and terrible at others. I remember trying archery however many years ago and I think I missed the board the first time and I got a bullseye the second time and then I got the board but missed the target the third time and it’s kind of like I’m either really good at something or terrible.
And being a new driver, I got my license I think September last year. Quite late in life. I was 48 and even now when comes to parking I’m either brilliant at it first time going great or if I don’t get it right it’s kind of it’s just not going to happen.
I could try 30 times going back and forth and it’s just I’m in my head, there’s the potential rejection sensitivity dysphoria, talking to myself about what the other cars or pedestrians might be thinking, although that’s improved. Working with it the whole time and just thinking for yourself what are you good at naturally and what are you, I want to say terrible at, what are you really really bad at? What do you wish you never had to do ever again? It’s not that recognising that you have a spiky profile and that you’re really good at some things and terrible at others means that you can completely avoid but Gay Hendricks talks about the “zone of genius” in his gorgeous book The Big Leap.
In an ideal world, we’d all be able to focus on our strengths. Especially with ADHD, a strengths-based approach is enormously beneficial, it builds confidence, it helps us get stuff done but often we deny that we’re good at things because we think if we’re able to do it then it’s easy for everyone, own your strengths, own your spiky profile and that leads us on to success amnesia (number seventeen) which I’ll be going into in more detail with the Full Moon and Super Moon members in their deeper dive. Helping them shine more brightly while attending to their nervous system and feeling safe enough to shine.
Success amnesia is something I only recently heard about reading the gorgeous, listening to the gorgeous Alex Partridge book on ADHD, I think it’s called Now It All Makes Sense and if you haven’t heard it or read it, it is gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.
His talking about success amnesia it made me laugh because I thought I was the only one. So many symptoms where, “Yep so many people have them!” That’s where groups and talking to others who understand can really help you gently laugh with yourself rather than at yourself but get to know yourself better. Success amnesia is where we forget the things we’ve done well because we’re so fixated on the next thing or the overwhelm or the, “Oh my god, there’s so much to do!” or the just forgetting.
It’s recognising that the working memory issues (number eighteen) that so often accompany ADHD mean we literally forget. So we’re fixated on something that we haven’t done, we have the working memory issues and it contributes to lower self-esteem, lower confidence and sometimes self-loathing just focusing entirely on the things that you’re not doing.
One thing you can do that can be really beneficial is to take just a moment or two at the end of each day or end of each working day or at any particular time, set an alarm, make it easy for yourself and think of something that you’ve done or when you are checking off your to-do list, I actually saw a lovely thing by Leonie Dawson today on her insta where she uses little post-it notes and after she’s done the things she takes them off one board and puts them in a diary so she can then see what she’s done so you could do a done list, I know we talked about that a few weeks ago but hers was lovely and colour-coded and you can listen to my interview with her on the podcast from season one but however you do it, make time to reflect and to respect your efforts. To recognise your efforts. It’s a really, really effective way to build confidence and self-esteem and to counter some of the harshness that comes with ADHD.
Again I’ll be going into this in more detail for the Full Moon and Super Moon members of The Sole to Soul Circle so you can upgrade if you choose at selfcarecoaching.net or selfcarecoaching.net/sole-to-soul-circle/.
Moving on to strengths-based approaches (number nineteen) which we talked about briefly earlier and it really is about focusing. We have a tendency to ruminate so focusing on what you’re doing well and doing as much of that as possible rather than trying to get better at something that is never going to come easy.
I’m not saying that for me, I do struggle with numbers a lot and I’ve recently changed accountants again, it’s been really stressful because I really do struggle with numbers and it’s also been like, “Oh my god! I feel like a grown-up, age 49!”
I have an understanding of my business that I’ve not had in the 20 and a half years I’ve been in business and working for myself even though I’ve dealt with accountants the whole time and done my own bookkeeping.
I’m not saying to never do anything you’re not good at. We get better at everything with practice but doing more of what you are naturally good at, what you naturally enjoy, that gives you the fuel to then manage the stressful things, the things that are not strengths-based and of course delegate as much as possible as well.
Moving on to task initiation (number twenty-one), something so many of us struggle with, the getting started. I set alarms, set timers, I have my desk diary, I have my phone diary, I’m pretty good with work things, I’m less good at starting breaks so I’ve started using a different coloured highlighter to build them into my schedule as well as alarms and just recognising the more you can have things set up for yourself to move into that as easily as possible, the less torturous it will feel.
Moving then to time blindness (number twenty-two) which I touched on earlier and it’s that getting lost in time, it might be that you wake up in the night and have no idea without looking at your watch or clock what time it is, it might be that you think that hours have passed and it’s been just 10 minutes or the other way around.
I remember when I was doing my therapy training and the idea was that the therapist had an eye on the clock but the client couldn’t see it and I used to find that really stressful in my own therapy sessions because I simply had no idea and I was constantly hypervigilant and constantly trying to manage and control the hour even though I was supposed to be relaxing into the hour.
I always make sure that, if it’s an in person session, that the client or supervisee can also see the timer or clock (as well as me). I think it’s a lovely thing about online sessions that everyone can see because it’s more relaxing for me with the time blindness to know what time it is. I have these beautiful, beautiful, beautiful little timer devices where they just show as they go down and they make kind of easy to switch off and do what works for you.
It can also be lovely sometimes to have an unscheduled stretch of time and maybe set an alarm around that even if it’s a long stretch just to give yourself permission to relax into it and then you won’t forget an appointment or something you need to do but it can be helpful to not be over scheduling yourself or not be like putting yourself under unnecessary pressure and just let yourself start all the things or move with what feels good.
Moving then to transitions (number 23) and I didn’t really recognise this until I learnt to drive and I had a time a few weeks ago where it took me half an hour to get out of the car when I got back after a long day of driving.
I’d driven to Galway, taking hours instead of like under two hours. It took nearly four hours and then we drove to Dublin. And then we had a meeting and we came back to Galway and then I drove back and it was my first motorway driving on my own and it was a lot. And I just kind of sat in the car for half an hour, just messaging loved ones.
I really wanted to go into see the cats but I did not want to move. And on trains, I would generally get up early like before my stop so that I was ready to get off at my stop because I wouldn’t trust myself to get up and move in time. Especially on the Tube, to be able to get up at least one stop in advance if I got a seat, and that would stop me getting lost in my book or whatever I was reading and potentially miss my stop.
Again just recognising, “OK transitions can be more challenging” and making it as easy as possible. Like now, with the car, it’s like I pull in and either decide to give myself permission to relax in the car after a long drive or it’s like, “OK, come on Evie Cat” (because I call myself Evie cat when I want to be friendly to myself) and feed the donkeys or go see the cats or whatever it is that makes getting out the car and onto the next thing more appealing.
It’s not that I think they’re getting back and immediately on with what has to be done.
Moving then to unmasking (number twenty-four) and recognising for yourself when it feels good and safe to unmask. Brené Brown has done such amazing work around shame and vulnerability and the benefits. And she’s very clear that we need to choose who we’re vulnerable around because some people will not have our best interests at heart.
Similarly when it comes to unmasking letting people know you have ADHD or any kind of neurodivergence or any kind of difference and if it’s not obvious, knowing who do you feel safe to be more of yourself around?
It’s a spectrum, it’s like there are going to be some people hopefully where you feel able to be your entire gorgeous, authentic self with. And there are going to be people who you feel more able to be yourself with but you’re still going to keep some bits back. Just giving yourself permission to calibrate that for yourself and experiment and trust yourself. Don’t feel like you have to express more of yourself than feels good.
And then finally moving on to VAST (number twenty-five). V A S T and that’s Drs Hallowell and Ratey’s new name for ADHD that they’re hoping will catch on. It’s recognising, first of all, the word disorder is hurtful for a lot of people.
Yes, there are disabling elements of it. And there are also benefits to it. But having disorder in the title really upsets some people and other people really appreciate it. Everyone’s different. ADD which it used to be it doesn’t really help most people: attention deficit disorder and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, again you mostly think of little boys like kind of jumping on the desk at school.
The VAST model stands for Variable Attention Stimulus Trait because it’s recognising that we don’t have a deficit of attention. We can have trying to think of the word for the opposite of a deficit an abundance of attention and it can sometimes be a wonderful thing and it can sometimes be a more challenging thing. But it’s variable and it’s around attention and what is stimulating stimulants often being medication for ADHD and traits rather than disorder.
I would love to hear from you. What do you think of the new name VAST rather than ADHD? What do you think of the jargon that I’ve gone into a little bit here today? What are your favourite and your least favourite terms? What has been most helpful for you in your own journey?
Thanks for listening. This episode, like all of them, has been produced by me, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham. Next week I’m delighted to be sharing my interview with my wonderful herbal medicine practitioner and Colleen Kennedy.
I’m really looking forward to sharing her wisdom with you and I hope you have a gorgeous week if you haven’t already and would like to, please share with someone you think might benefit. Rate, review, subscribe, like – all the things.
And enjoy your delightfully differently wired brain. When it feels like a struggle, honour that. Give yourself the compassion and care that you deserve and need so sending enormous love and thanks again for listening.
Thank you for listening to this episode of The Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I want to help as many people as possible with trauma histories and or ADHD learn how to help yourself to connect with your Self with that uppercase S: that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself and to become more fully embodied, at peace and at ease in your own skin.
To help me do this, if you can think of someone who might benefit, please share it. And if you haven’t already and would like to, you can subscribe comment rate review and this episode like all of them so far has been produced by me your host Eve Menezes Cunningham. Thanks again for listening. And if you’d like more on this week’s theme you can subscribe as a free subscriber or paid member of The Sole to Soul Circle at selfcarecoaching.net/sole-to-soul-circle/ find out more at selfcarecoaching.net
Each week, Half Moon members (that’s the free subscribers) get some bonus content to support balance and harmony so it’s a bit of a deeper dive into the podcast theme and then the following day Full Moon and Supermoon members get additional deep dives into helping themselves shine by really supporting really soothing really working well with your nervous system so that you feel safe enough to expand your comfort zone and do the things that you already know to do perhaps but just supporting you and taking those steps let me know if any of that is of interest and I hope you have a gorgeous day.